The Biebs

Ever wondered what I'd look like as Justin Bieber? Well wonder no more because the worlds best photoshop artists have done it!

How dare they! Trying to merge me with Justin Bieber, it's ridiculous. Oh well, at least I can pull it off, I suit the swooshy bowl cut emo fringe way better than he does!

My make over

Yes, I have had another makeover. Now that I'm older I thought I'd better start dressing my age:

I think I look rather dashing.

The all-in-one sweater-jumpsuit!

Actually, I have no idea what this is. It kind of looks like...um... yeah I don't know.

ComplainativeBastard T-Shirts

Also, new in store- ComplainativeBastard T-Shirts! Made by Mr. McNugget and retailing at only $99.99c each, these T-Shirts are a must have for all you fashionistas out there! Luxuriantly soft on your skin, the T-Shirt is specifically designed not to give you a rash! Buy Now while they're on sale!

ComplainativeBastard Masks

Be the first of your friends to get a ComplainativeBastard Mask. I made them all myself (with help from Mr. McNugget).

The Graham Norton Show

Today I have TiVoed The Latest Graham Norton Show episode. It probably won't be on TV for a while though because I get it early with TiVo. But anyway, I'm looking forward to it because Snoop Dogg is gonna be on it. Snoop Dogg is my idol! He is so Fo-shizzle gangsta G! We are so tight, like, we facebook (I post on his wall all the time) and MSN (we always chat but he never seems to want to video call). He has about 20 different facebook profiles that I'm all friends with!
Peace owt! Wiki-wiki word, FRESH! Fo-shizzle!
Here is a picture of me, Snoop Dogg and Kiit Catt:

P.S. If you don't already know who Kiit Catt is, he's an up-and-coming rap star. We tight too. You heard it here first.

Shuffling

Today I am learning to shuffle, like LMFAO. So far... I suck! But I'll keep you posted.
Here is a picture that Mr. McNugget took:

Hover cat

Ahh!! My house really is haunted! Just now Mr. McNugget is floating around the living room! I have no idea what is going on. Here's a picture:

P.S. I haven't been able to give him his daily shave because he's been floating around everywhere.

Haunted house

OMG I think my house is haunted!!! Last night I heard all this banging going on and when I got up in the morning up my living room furniture was rearranged (quite nicely done actually). Mr. McNugget must be playing a trick on me it think (or is he?)

Text language

If, like me, you don't understand text language... Maybe this will help:
Wiki-wiki word, FRESH!

Fan art

Now for some fantastic art sent in by my fans:

I don't know whether I should be offended or repulsed... Mr. McNugget wasn't very impressed either!

Automatic wipe and flush toilet system

Eww, sounds horrible!

Just saying :)xoxoxoxoxo

Mr. McNugget is back!

...And I hate it! Whoever the person was that stole him taught him some very bad habits. I don't even know who he is anymore. He's started to do some really terrible things- like drinking out of the toilet without a straw. I thought I'd taught him better than that! And he peed on my brand new duvet, instead of the one I specifically set for him. And worst of all, he stole the keys to my car and took it for a joyride, without inviting me!
I just don't know what to do. Maybe I neglected him as a child (I did drop him on his head a few times). But there has to be some way to rekindle our relationship. I want the old McNugget back!
Here he is as a baby: he looked just like me!

Wingers

Wingers. We've all seen them. Wannabe Gingers.

I rest my case...

Mr. McNuggets world tour

Oh, I'm so sad. Mr. McNugget has been stolen! And I keep receiving these random pictures of him in different places from around the world.

Here he is in the Greek islands

Here he is in Portland

Here he is at a Hotel in Paris

He made a few friends in England

What the hell is going on here?!


I think they've been feeding him too much Lasagna in Italy

This is at a nuclear power plant in America

And here he is happily drunk in Vegas
I hope I get him back soon..I don't think they're respecting his bedtimes.

Flamingo

I found this person while I was Googling flamingos. The likeness is uncanny...
The sad thing is: This is my father:
Okay, I'll admit, he has nice guns.
Peace owt! Wiki-wiki word, FRESH!

Caterpillars

I have an irrational fear of caterpillars. I swear they stalk me. Seriously.
Just Saying :)xoxoxoxoxox
Ahh, it's so scary!

The lack of a decent education

Education. These days it is sadly lacking. The other day I ran into a bunch of high school kids who told me that all they did in class all day was sit at a computer and play games while the teacher droned on about something useless like operating systems. Who the hell is going to need to know that $#*!? When I went to school they taught us useful stuff like how to throw a punch properly or how to plagiarise without getting caught. These days they don't teach kids anything worth while. If I was a teacher my students would be the smartest people around. So if you'd like to learn something decent then you should read my blog.
Wiki-wiki word, FRESH!
Here is what I would look like as a teacher:
Hot damn!

Drive throughs

Yesterday I decided to get up with today's fast-food culture by going through the drive through at my favourite fast-food restaurant- Mc Ronalds. It was my first time using a drive through so I was a little bit nervous but it didn't look too complicated. So I ordered my food and drove to the window to pick it up. But when I got there they wouldn't give me my food! Apparently I didn't pay for it properly or something stupid like that. But I wasn't going to take any of their crap! So I got out of my car and climbed in through the order window, grabbed a couple of cheese burgers and bolted...
But then when I got home I Googled "How to use a drive through appropriately." As it turns out I did forget to pay (I drove straight past the pay window). Oh well, at least I got a couple of free cheeseburgers :)
Wiki-wiki word, FRESH!

And, these idiots don't even know how to spell the word 'through'

I hate technology!

Technology is ruining my life! Everywhere I go, people are txting and playing on their phones. I was trying to be friendly when I came across a group of young girls the other day. I said hi and asked them intense personal questions like you're supposed to do when you're an old man and you see a group of girls. But they all had their iPods plugged in and they couldn't hear me! It's ridiculous, I don't spend hours in front of the computer, writing stupid FML statuses on some lame website....

Puzzle

Since all I ever do is sit at home and complain about stuff I thought I should get a new hobbie, just to shake it up a bit. So, I've decided to take up jigsaw puzzles. I went out and bought a 800 piece puzzle, I was so excited. But when I opened it it was broken! It looked nothing like it did on the box. I was so annoyed! And so, I've decided to stick to what I do best- Complaining!
Here is what the stupid puzzle looks like:

It was meant to look like this:

Pretty budget aye?