Complainative Man- at it again!

I'm so incensed with rage! This "Complainative Man" is stealing all my endorsment deals! I was signed  up to endorse the New Rubber toilet seats, manufactured by Rubbr and co. They were going to have my face on the cover! Unfortunately, they wanted a younger, more attractive looking man (I don't know what the problem is? I'm pretty spiffing for my age!) and Complainiative Man was quick to sign up. Apparantly it restricts people's bowel movements to look at "ugly old faces" while using the toilet. So I am unsure as to why they wish Complainative Man to be the face of RubbrButt. Not that I care, anyway. I still have my pickle endorsement job to go back to.


For those of you who don't remember, I scored this gig to encourage people to buy lots of pickles to survive the end of the world.